Friday, February 07, 2003


To: The Rittenhouse Review
From: Robert L. Belichick
Date: February 5, 2003

Thank you. Thank you. Your post on Eric Alterman’s appearance on “Crossfire” was perfect.

I know there aren’t many people who could actually appreciate how pathetic Tucker Carlson and the other wing-nut, L. Brent Bozell, were, but their blathering about “it’s a lie” when one delivers facts is so Rush Limbaugh.

I have to laugh when Carlson attacks anyone who hints on categorizing someone as it being an example of his opponent “calling them names,” when his whole shtick is, as a first line of attack, call someone a name. Gosh, it feels so high school debate team.

Robert L. Belichick

Jim Capozzola of The Rittenhouse Review responds:

“So Rush Limbaugh”? “So high school”? You, sir, are too generous.

Wednesday, February 05, 2003


To: The Rittenhouse Review
From: K.T.B.
Date: February 3, 2003

Those of you with fabulous manes (and you’ve made sure to point out that fact previously, you bastard) can’t understand that Matt Lauer suffers from the worst-case scenario of male pattern baldness.

He has neither the gracefully receding hairline nor the distinguished bald spot in the rear, both of which can be framed to advantage by skilled hair stylists. Rather, Lauer is suffering the uniform thinning of the entire top of the head, for which there is no dignified style available, other than the full head shave.

Perhaps in ten years he will have the chrome-dome book-ended by flowing locks that gives one the look of a serious man, but until then, if he lets his hair grow beyond a half-inch he is doomed to look like the Nicholas Cage character in “Adaptation.”

You may not agree with the haircut, but you must admit that he has little choice. I hope you will respond with sympathy rather than ridicule.

And yes, I’m headed toward the Lauer stage myself, so it hits home hard.


Jim Capozzola of The Rittenhouse Review responds:

When I wrote about Lauer last week, remarking upon his “new” hairstyle, I did so after having seen him on the “Today” show for just a few moments. I did not notice the creeping male-pattern baldness to which K.T.B. refers. Thus, my comments were not intended as disparagement, only surprise at the sudden change in Lauer’s appearance.

I assure K.T.B., and all readers, that my intention was not to mock Lauer for the unfortunate event of his hair loss, nor anyone else sharing in this development.

In fact, while I do continue to enjoy, at age 40, a full head of very thick -- almost annoyingly thick -- and fast-growing hair, none of it gray yet, by the way, I have for more than a decade made a point of not making light of the hair loss experienced by others.

As my eldest brother, who has seen some modest hair loss, once pointed out, doing so would be impolite and impolitic as, in his words, “That’s just the kind of thing that can come around and bite you in the butt later.”

Absolutely true. I know that day will arrive eventually and I do not intend to leave myself open to ridicule for having made light of the history of other men.

And so, while I am grateful for the current status of my mane, I do not and will not intentionally tease those not so fortunate.

I guess I should say, though, probably to the disgust and dismay of K.T.B. and others, that over the weekend I shaved off all of the hair on my head, just to see what it would look like. No reason to be upset: It will all be back within a few more days.